Grant me a wish!

Talking about wishes this morning only brought us to a dead end.

I think that wishing for things and working towards them is a positive way to look at life because you keep discovering new things about you and the world around you but this other wise friend of mine said that wishes only bring pain, fear and anxiety. You should be happy and content with your life as it is.

I have learnt from experience that if you really want something, in the end you get it, with the condition of course that you don't give up working towards it. So why stop wishing if you know that in the end you will have what you wished for? Even in the event that your wish isn't fulfilled, because you didn't try enough or because you were really unlucky, the time you spent visualising yourself achieving your goal is time well spent. It made you happy and urged you to try harder.

I would like to hear what other people think about this. So it you come across these lines do pass your experience around for others and me of course to read.

the singing buttler

Trying hard not to fall,

What am I thinking?

I follow his steps.

Bloody rain, bloody baron, bloody song.

Raindrops the size of golf balls blur my eyes,

the silk dress is soaked, my ruined hair whips my cheek,

he's insane, look at the maid weep.

The bag...the bag is at her feet.

He sings all wrong, I can't hear a word,

Keep focused, the bag is all you want.

The stuff inside will make you rich

I hope he slips and breaks his hips.

I'll catch a cold, my feet are sore,

I am frozen to the core.

A turn of a screw is all I need

to make him fall, to steal the bling.

I watched him take it from the bank

Napoleon's necklace,

he'll sell it for some land,

the stupid baron of royal rank.

Three hundred diamonds belong to me

romantic bastard bedding ME.

I think the song is about to end.

-Let's get off this roof sweet darling, I am all spent..

take me inside, warm me up,

send these people away, we don't need them

...it's alright, look, I'll carry the bag.



Katharsis

I have never discussed the time I went there nor have I written anything about it. I think mainly this is because the whole experience is surrounded by the impression of a dream. I remember everything I did, saw and felt but I am not consciously convinced that the experience actually took place. Of course I have photos, books, an amazing mask I bought which is now above the fireplace but still its reality eludes me.

This trip is for me the only proof I have that time travel is a fact and that drugs are not necessary for a trance-like experience. She can do all that for you if you are open enough to listen to her commands. After all Venice is a sultry mistress, among other, more honourable things.

Venice: Where outside fails.

Inside Venice. That's all there is. The whole city is an interior, being inside closed doors makes you feel trapped into the familiarity of today. You need to be outside of today and inside the continuous act that the city asks you to perform. This city is beyond time and reality; beyond truth and compromise. It is a mind game.

My mind was moaning with please, my subconscious was storing senses for a decade's worth of dreams, and I fell in love with everything. I had no reason to look up. I never looked up because the sky had lost its grandeur. It was nothing but a faded old rug.

The smells of fresh vegetables under my window in the morning. The sound of the river boats, the church bells followed by wing flapping and then silence. The smell of fresh ice cream, hot bread and coffee locked in the small interior of the piazza. It flies around, sneaks inside your room, it will fill you, neither of you can escape the merge because there's nowhere to run to. The great outdoors is a lost case. 

Rivers

Another day comes to an end. Even though I knew it would I wasn't entirely convinced when I told myself some hours before.

I don't remember where I picked this photo from but it is exactly what I need to look at so that the knot that my mind has been turned into can be loosened and If I am lucky be undone.

There is something about rivers that calms me. I picture them as the veins of a sacred creature that tolerates my existence on his skin. I envy rivers because they are tirelessly constant, passionately determined and ceaselessly moving towards a clear destination. Like pulsing veins they sustain all life, like messangers they carry their findings to the source. They are wise, sometimes cruel but always great philosophers.

I wish I had a river to listen to right now.

Metamorphosis

Metamorphosis is the new form, physical or mental -usually it is both- you receive after an event or a series of events during a specific period of time. It can happen many times in a person's life. Sometimes you know it's happening, other times you find out long after it's done.

Good Morning people of the page.

This is one of Natalie Shau's amazing pictures. It is called 'the glass soul'. I see a woman just prior to the event that would lead her to her metamorphosis. Her glass will break and something new will emerge and then who knows...maybe she would be pleased; though metamorphosis rarely leads directly to pleasure.

First, it is the desire to change something that drives you towards it, then subconsciously, you bring yourself closer to the events that will enable you to make that change, you meet people, go to a place, stop doing something you've been doing for so long..and then you wake up one day and feel that something has changed lately and that you are not sure what it is and then you know.

Contrary to morphosis, when without your consent you are formed  by the events and people around you that you have no control of, metamorphosis is your chance to fix, rearrange or rebuild yourself, your chance to form yourself according to what you think yourself deserves..

Perhaps the girl in the picture has decided that this is what she deserves and should remain like this, locked in a glass.

I decided that

I am ready for another journey of metamorphosis. I've been metamorphosed twice so far in my life and I wish to change form once again. At thirty-five, you feel that your mental hard drive works at its potential. You run a family, work hard and have the desire to learn, to create and to live. You have proved to yourself that you have what it takes. You deserve the change, you've earned it. You can work towards it more consciously than before. Now that you are free of the dramas, now that you know what is going on around you, now that you are calm and strong, now it is the time for the wildest metamorphosis of all.

Perhaps one of the last, or the last one.